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And that is true. Life never is fair, no matter how much you want it to be. You want to experience all the wonders and delicacies of life but it’s very rare we get to. Almost zero chance. Why? Because there’s always something or someone that’s holding onto the leash around your neck.
When you’re young it’s usually your parents who will start as the little pebble in your shoe which will rapidly progress to causing the flow of your desires/dreams/wishes to be stagnant. For certain, you would feel really angry and lash out at them. Then, most likely you would find someone close perhaps a boyfriend or girlfriend or maybe your best friend to complain to. If they’re empathetic then that would help remove part of the emotional burden. If they’re derogative then you’re gonna feel even lower and start getting saturnine and blame the entire world for not understanding you.
But after a while of crying and cursing silently, with only the dregs of anger and bitterness left behind, you’d start feeling better. Perhaps you would start to see some sense in what your parents have said but still wishing that they would have an inkling of how you would feel. Then, for a short moment, you would start hoping that your mom or dad would knock on your door to discuss it with you again and maybe change their minds. Sometimes if you’re lucky, it happens. But otherwise, it doesn’t. Like me.
Sigh.
I submitted my profile and pictures the other day to this models magazine. It was just merely for fun at first. Then I received a reply from them saying that they’d viewed my profile and if I agree to their terms, email them my number. So I did. No doubt after that I got a little excited. A few days later, the producer called me and asked me to attend the photo shoot on the next day. Naturally, I’d get excited. So I told my mom and naturally she was against it. I spent a few hours convincing and I did in the end.
But guess what? When my dad comes home, I tell him, at first he was okay then suddenly my mom switched sides and joined forces with him to discourage me. That was what I feared. My mom is always like that. Sigh.
Oh well. At least I know that I was good enough to get selected. =/ Still…it would be awesome if I could go. (huge) sigh. Life’s like that I guess. Individualism is practically non-existent for me at this period of life. Ah well..fudge it.
